stacie's sacred space

writer's block or rambling

i have so much swirling around in my head, i don't even know what to write.

may in all of it's beauty has just about swallowed me.

i run from field to field, the house is a disaster, i miss family dinners, i lose my patience, we get dirtier and need more showers, we get three late homework slips for one kid (maybe because i project chaos and worries onto him), i drop a gift i'm taking to the teachers (two weeks late) and glass and skittles shatter all over the parking lot of school, the washer and dishwasher break at the same time, i have crazy dreams that tell me a little about how stressed i am, and i miss workouts (which i need badly with all this pent up energy inside of me)!

i need to sit still.

i might even need to say no a little more often than i say yes!

thank goodness most people are forgiving that i forget stuff and i'm late showing up or turning stuff in.

i walk around tired most of the time.

perpetual exhaustion!

i bet when i look back at my ramblings here, there will be a lot of posts where i say i'm tired.

that's that.

j number one

this dude is a ball of energy.

he plays on two teams right now, he gets his school work done (with almost every graded paper i see has a near perfect score), he's a good friend, he loves his family, and he wants to help me too!

he makes me proud because he works so hard and gives everything he's got!

he makes me proud because he was tired this morning yet he knew how important it was to go to mass, and he went without complaining at 7:30!

he makes me proud because he's thankful his sibs support him by watching his sports teams!

he makes me proud because he scored two goals for his lacrosse team this week!

he makes me proud because he asks to come assist me on photo shoots, and he does a good job at it!

i'm coming undone over here, and he just keeps going and going and going.

i would love an energy donation from him.

i'll keep going and going and going because i'm thankful for joey and all the j kids!

a real perspective

these are the people that make today so happy.

i couldn't stop smiling when i read these sweet cards from my three big kids!

there perspective is real.

 

 

 

yes, i like a lot of food.

yes, my job is to be a mom.

yes, i must jump rope more than i thought i did.

yes, i help them when they need help.

yes, i'm good at cleaning even though i didn't think so.

yes, one of my favorite hobbies is getting exercise.

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sometimes i don't know the impact i make on this world so it's good to have today to be reminded.

i am the momma i am because i have a great moms who teach me lessons all the time.

i also have amazing friends who role model love only a momma can give to her children to help me on some of the best days and some of the hardest days too!

tunes

i love listening to some good music!

ipod dj is fun to do with the kids.

when they pick classics by van morrison, the beatles, or tom petty i get really excited.

i dance around the kitchen to nicky minaj and snoop dog for them too!

there are lyrics that just speak to my soul.

there are beats that slow me down and some that make me run faster too.

tunes connect me to people and places and times in my life.

i totally remember listening to a toto album at a specific campground while i was in college. i remember the spring weather, the beer can chicken we made over the fire, the people i was with, the canoe trip we had just taken that day.

i also remember when i was a young kid, asking my parents to wait till the song was over before turning off the car.

my kids do that sometimes now :)

lately i've been rockin' out to zac brown band and jimmy buffet.

this photo shoot really made me "wishin i was kneep deep in the water somewhere"

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meet our neighbors and friends, the eirichs.

colton is johnny's best little buddie.

 

 

my yearnings

the simple life.

i yearn for it.

i am reminded quite often that i just might be living it right now as i type.

i yearn to get back to making space this the story of my life too.

it's hard to get all that vulnerable and open when my heart is this cluttered though, and that it is these days!

bear with me.

twenty12 has been quite a year for me so far!

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i got to go out and snap at sunset a couple times this beautiful week.

the joy i see when i'm looking through my lens is pretty amazing!

meet josie and andrea, two sweeties who get to make their first communions tomorrow.

this is a big deal!!

 

 

 

captured

joey and his bestie, aidan were subbing in for each other most of this game.

somehow every time they interacted, i never had my camera ready.

i loved their interactions, i could see their hearts and their friendship in ordinary moments.

that stuff melts my heart!

joey is in the red shorts, and aidan is in the pink and blue wild shorts.

i love what i captured of them slamming into each other to celebrate another win!

 

it's hard for me to photograph my own kids sports cuz i'm watching and talking to dave and kind of paying attention to the other three j kids playing around me!

i'm glad i took my big camera to this game though.

soccer seasons are dwindling for the middles, and i don't know if i've even taken the big camera.

nor do i know if i'll have a chance with all the other activities we're running kids to and fro!

sigh.

together

two parents, four kids, lots of activities.

we are pulled in a lot of directions, and we have to divide and conquer a lot.

i don't like it.

it's so much better when we get to be together.

today we got to be together watching joey playing lax.

beautiful, glorious sunday ... lazy morning at home, church, lax game.

it was awesome!!

and we'll return to normal life going our many different directions tomorrow.

boo! i miss my people when we separate.

separation that makes me ache.

it's life though. 

here we go, ready or not, we're jumping into another week!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

what i'm noodling on these days

• how to redecorate my red wall (a.k.a. the heart of my home)
• this meditation i found last week on my calendar

(god in the moment from ann voskamp's one thousand gifts)

whatever the pace, time will keep it and there's no

outrunning it, only speeding it up and if you pound the

feet harder, the minutes pound faster too. and i race

for more and i snag on time and i leak empty and the

longer i keep running, the longer the gash, and i drain

bleed away.

hurry always empties a soul, and it has mine.

 

• reading a book on my iphone - yes, i bought my very first ibook from itunes. it's 829 pages, and i'm on page 154!

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that's where my heart and mind are these days.

it's may today.

in just a little over a month it will be summer and my babies will be back in the nest more.

can i get a woohoo from any other crazed mommas reading here?

woohoo!!!!

my mumbo jumbo & pics of a cutie

i've been kind of down and out lately.

just not operating at one hundo percent.

sometimes i just need to try to do usual stuff to snap out of it.

other times doing usual stuff just makes me land in bed or on the couch for the better portion of the days.

this learning to listen to my body isn't always easy.

i'm glad i'm on that path anyway.

okay enough of my mumbo jumbo ... onto some of the usual stuff i've done while i haven't felt well!

here's a quick little snap session i did with my buddie jack who is four today.

he really just wanted to play toys in my back yard.

the balloons and camera were in the way of all the mowing he told me he had to do.

 

 

 

 

 

 

i've known this guy his whole life, and he has an awesome family.

he's a lucky duck!

and i am too because these people are in my life.

love you, kel, adam, maggie, and jack!!

me and my iphone

i finally took a peek at some of the pics in my photo stream.

now that i don't even have to plug my iphone into my computer i miss reviewing what i snapped.

here are some of the moments i snapped of me this month!

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ice cream after a photo shoot.

 

dave rescued me when i got stuck pushing my littles in the double stoller walking home from the park in the pooring rain!

 

coffee with cream and dump trucks. yum!

 

bunny ears.

 

seven-thirty mass easter tradition.

 

as close to the beach as we're gonna get this spring.

 

chaos in the car. road trips rock!

 

my assistant snapping pics of me snapping :)

 

snapping and driving (probably on my way home from lax or soccer or dance).

i promise i don't do this often but sometimes i just can't resist the colors in the sky!

 

peace out, people.

 

happy eleventh anniversary to us! cold, rainy, broken down silver mini van (the only car that fits our whole family).

marriage has it's ups and downs ... i'm so happy dave is right next to me on this exciting ride!

it's a good life we have, it's a good life we work hard to achieve.

even after a rough few days, i still see the beauty that surrounds me!